you forget.

you forget how important it is to love the ones around you daily.

well at least i do. it is a major fault of mine. i don't show them that i care as much as i should. it is something i struggle with. i heard that is normal ;)

but it is holidays and birthdays that remind us. and walking down the street and seeing something that reminds you of a loved one.

the beginning of november is hard for me. as is the end of april.

it's my sister's birthday.

november 3rd.

it's the anniversary of her death.

april 28th.

i hate that after 10 years the memories fade. i wish i could remember her like when we were little. and she was giving my parents a hard time.

it's her birthday that i remember. i remember the love i had for her and the love she had for me. and what our relationship was. and what i wish it could have flourished into. but i hold the fleeting memories close to my heart. and i open the emotional memories to remember her on her birthday. it seems fitting to celebrate her life on her day.

jennifer ashley
i was cleaning out my apartment during the hurricane and i found the bracelet that was hers that i kept to remember her. it was hidden under all my jewelry and not displayed. but i remembered as soon as i saw it the reason i kept it. so it is now displayed. it doesn't get worn. it never will again.

it is hard to remember the good times and easy to remember the pain. but the little things like this help me.

sorry to be so deep on a friday. but i told you i was going to be more real. and this is me. alert the media...i have feelings :)